What to Say to Someone Before a Concert

Walking into a concert venue, you spot a friend, a date, or even a stranger who’s also there for the same band. You smile. You nod. But then-what do you actually say?

It’s not about finding the perfect line. It’s about matching the energy. Concerts aren’t just about the music. They’re about the shared moment right before it all starts. The buzz in the air, the way people shift their weight, the way someone clutches their ticket like it’s a lucky charm. What you say matters less than how you say it.

Keep It Simple, Keep It Real

You don’t need a script. Most people aren’t looking for poetry. They’re looking for connection. A quick, genuine line works better than a rehearsed joke.

• "You excited for this?"
• "First time seeing them live?"
• "I’ve been waiting for this show since last year."
• "The opening act is insane-did you hear their new single?"

These aren’t clever. They’re human. And they open the door. If the person responds with a grin or a nod, you’ve already done your job. If they’re quiet, that’s fine too. Sometimes silence before a show is part of the ritual.

Read the Room

Not everyone wants to chat. Some people come to concerts to zone out. They’re wearing noise-canceling headphones, staring at their phone, or just standing still like they’re meditating. Don’t force it. If someone looks closed off, a smile and a nod are enough.

On the flip side, if someone’s bouncing on their heels, singing along to the soundcheck, or yelling at their friend about the setlist-they’re ready to talk. That’s your cue. Ask about their favorite song. Mention a lyric that stuck with you. People love to share what they love.

One time at a Tame Impala show in Auckland, I asked a guy next to me, "Which album are you here for?" He lit up. Turned out he’d seen them five times before, and this was his first time with his daughter. We ended up talking for 20 minutes. The show hadn’t even started yet.

Avoid the Overused Lines

Some phrases sound good in movies. In real life? They fall flat.

• "This is going to be epic!" - Too vague. Everyone says it. It means nothing.
• "I hope they play [song]!" - Unless you know they’re a hardcore fan, this puts pressure on them to agree. What if they hate that song?
• "Are you here alone?" - Too personal. Don’t assume.
• "I’ve been waiting for this since I was a kid." - Unless you’re 60 and this band formed in the ‘80s, it sounds forced.

These lines feel like filler. They’re not bad. They’re just lazy. People can tell when you’re reciting a line instead of speaking from real interest.

Use the Music as a Bridge

The best conversations before a concert start with the music itself. Not the artist’s Instagram, not the merch, not the VIP seating. The songs.

Try this: "What’s the one song you can’t wait to hear?"

That question works because it’s personal, specific, and invites a story. Someone might say, ""Lose Yourself"-I used to play it before every exam." Or, ""The Less I Know The Better"-I danced to it at my wedding."

Or, if you’re unsure, mention a song you love and ask if they’ve heard it. "Have you listened to their new album? I think the bassline on track three is unreal." That’s not a question to answer-it’s an invitation to share.

Be Aware of the Space

Concert venues are crowded. You’re not in a coffee shop. You’re in a hallway with 500 other people trying to find their spot. Don’t block the flow. Don’t stand in the middle of the walkway while you talk. Move with the crowd. Keep it short. A 30-second exchange is better than a five-minute monologue.

Also, don’t assume everyone knows the same things. Maybe your friend has seen the band three times. Maybe the person next to you just bought their ticket last night. Don’t talk like you’re an expert. Stay curious.

What If You’re Nervous?

It’s okay to feel awkward. Most people do. The trick? Focus on listening more than speaking.

Ask a question. Then shut up. Let them talk. Nod. Smile. Say, "That’s wild," or, "I didn’t know that." People love to be heard. Especially before a show, when they’re feeling something big.

One time, I stood next to a woman at a Phoebe Bridgers show who didn’t say a word for ten minutes. I just smiled. Then, right before the lights went down, she turned to me and whispered, "This song saved my life." I didn’t say anything back. I just held her gaze. And when the first note hit, we both cried.

It’s Not About the Words

What you say matters, but it’s not the whole story. The real magic is in the silence, the shared glance, the way you both lean forward when the first drum hit drops. Sometimes the best thing you can say is nothing at all.

Before a concert, people aren’t looking for advice. They’re not looking for opinions. They’re looking for a moment of belonging. A quiet confirmation that they’re not alone in feeling this.

So don’t overthink it. Say something real. Then let the music take over.

What If You’re Going Alone?

If you’re going to a concert solo, you’re not weird. You’re normal. More people go alone than you think.

Here’s what works: Walk in with your head up. Don’t look like you’re waiting to be rescued. If someone makes eye contact, smile. If they say something, respond. If they don’t? That’s fine too.

Bring a notebook. Write down the first song you hear. Jot down a lyric that hits you. Later, you’ll remember the moment-not the conversation.

And if someone does talk to you? You’ve already won. You showed up. That’s the hardest part.

What About Dates?

If you’re going with someone you’re dating, don’t turn it into a performance. Don’t try to impress them with your knowledge of the band’s discography. Don’t quiz them on setlists.

Just be present. Hold their hand when the crowd surges. Laugh when they sing off-key. Whisper, "This part always gets me," when the chorus hits.

The best pre-concert moment with a date isn’t the conversation. It’s the silence that comes right before the lights go down-and the way you both breathe at the same time.